It's true. Today, I don't want my children. I love my oldest daughter to death - she's smart, and respectful, and responsible. However, when her 4 yr old sister asks to play with her, my oldest finds every excuse under the sun to do something else, without her. I can't force the bonding process... and I'm sick of encouraging it. I just want to click my three heels and turn around and find them magically playing "Littlest Pet Shop" with smiles and giggles that fill the air. But - no... All I hear from the other room is "Stevie, will you play with me?" and the 9 yr old reply "not right noooooow Ava!"
Of ALL children - my 4 yr old is asking to die. Her "terrible" face has been going for months now. She refuses to eat when she's at the table. She refuses to listen until we have to use our OUTSIDE voices to get our point across. She's never happy, despite our best efforts to make her happy. She's hyper - I've self-diagnosed the child with ADHD. She wakes up and her brain is going 200mph, and she stays that way until she's forced into bed at night. Today, I cannot take it anymore. I have closed the curtains over my eyes and shut out the world... she has pushed my last button.
My 1 yr old is sweet, but just as terrible. As I type this, she's crawled up on the couch with the 4 yr old who is trying to watch a movie. Victoria is kicking Ava in the head, and Ava is yelling "STOP IT!" and Victoria is laughing a vicious laugh and deep inside - I'm laughing too... I've wanted to kick her in the head all day, and now I get to live vicariously through my 1 yr old. I've cleaned the house 10 times today, and each time I clean a room, I look behind me and Victoria has destroyed it again... in her wake, a trail of toys that I have to re-sort and put away again.
Why, oh why did work give us a three day weekend? Don't they realize I look forward to my 5 day vacations from my children!?
No comments:
Post a Comment